And Now We Have Everything

And Now We Have Everything

On Motherhood Before I Was Ready

Book - 2018
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Operating Instructions for the Millennial set: a fiercely honest account of becoming a mother before you're "ready."

If you feel totally alienated by the cutesy, sanctimonious tone of the "motherhood industrial complex," this is the book for you.

After getting accidentally pregnant in her twenties, Meaghan O'Connell realized that brutally honest, agenda-less resources on the emotional and existential impact of motherhood were nowhere to be found. In And Now We Have Everything , she offers a brave new perspective on the transition into motherhood. With her dark humor and a hair-trigger B.S. detector, Meaghan addresses the pervasive imposter syndrome that comes with unplanned pregnancy, the second adolescence of a changing postpartum body, the myth that giving birth is a "magical" experience, the problem of sex post-baby, the strange push to make 'mom friends', and the fascinating weirdness of stepping into a new, not-yet-comfortable identity.

Addressing the fears and anxieties of Millennial women in an unflinchingly frank, funny, and visceral way, Meaghan fills a void in the discussion on motherhood, identity, what it means to be ready.

Publisher: New York : Little, Brown and Company, ©2018.
ISBN: 9780316393843
0316393843
Characteristics: v, 230 pages ;,22 cm.

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what_is_a_kindle
Sep 25, 2018

Yes! Yes! Yes! As the only thing I've ever mothered is several cats and a stray butterfly with a broken wing who REFUSED to eat a spoonful of apple sauce, I found this book VERY informative. If Beyonce can weigh 218 pounds when pregnant and wait 6 months before trying to lose her baby weight than so can human women! If I ever grow a baby, I will force anyone to read this first before interacting with me. #blessedbethefruit

JessicaGma Sep 06, 2018

I appreciated the ambivalent tone of the book where Meaghan wanted to have kids, and then realised she wasn't the "perfect" parent, and it's darn hard. Too much time and ink is spent on being the perfect parent with no cracks visible and how glamourous and wonderful being a mother will be, and, hey, turns out you can be depressed and unenthused about the tiny person you birthed. It's a good counterpoint.

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taylorwoods
Jun 13, 2018

For someone like me who is still unsure of the prospect of becoming a parent to a human being, this book was so important and had my complete attention from the beginning. Meghan O'Connell wastes no time holding back on her true feelings in a world where mommy wars are rampant and every Pinterest mom has to have mason jars of pre-made baby food and crap. I can't fathom the idea of pushing a human out of me and then having to keep up an image because god forbid I didn't breast-feed my child or deliver vaginally.

This memoir really helped me have a different perspective that I think (or at least would imagine) parenting books leave out. The baby, who is left unnamed throughout, is a big character but not our main character. The main focus is on Meaghan and how she felt and what she experienced while attempting to take care of her baby and sustain her fragile relationship with her fiance. I really admired her for also opening up the discussion of postpartum depression, as this is one of my biggest fears of potential parenthood.

I recommend this book to all walks of people- parents, new parents, and those who like me are on the fence.

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